I am finally back. I was not only away from the blog, but somehow I felt lost with my squash too.
Two days ago, due to a message from Ioana (a #squashaddict from Cluj-Napoca) I’ve set myself to renew the domain of this blog. It was just expired for few days and did not had the motivation to do renew. Thus, thank you Ioana for the needed kick to do it. Looking forward to the guest post you’ve promised 🙂
Now, why do I feel I was lost with my squash is the story of the last 200 hours since I haven’t been here on the blog with any news.
This picture kind of says it all. After a smooth learning journey for my first two years with squash, the last 8-10 months have not been smooth at all. But on the contrary, hitting rock bottom (discouragingly realistic point).
I’ve read about it and I also heard it in interviews from professional athletes in different sports (tennis, squash etc). Of course, I did not believe it will happen to me. First, because well: I am me. And also because I am not a professional athlete.
What I am though, in any aspect of my life, is Learning Addict. I came to realise that one of my biggest motivational factors of becoming a Squash Addict is actually my addiction to learning itself, to progress, to becoming better every day no matter what I do.
Thus, while I was not only in the point where progress was lacking, but feeling my level of squash was starting to drop, so did my motivation and addiction to it. I had to fight with those thoughts that were whispering me to just stop; that I am not good enough for this sport and that I will never get to be the player I was believing in the first two years I could become.
As Djokovic said yesterday in a post-match interview at Australian Open, the professional’s sport journey is just a life journey. I had somehow to take this journey, to take this hit and be able to find the resources to come back.
And here I am. In the past week I’ve attended two tournaments (a national one for veterans – over 35 – and last night my club league).
In the first one I did not do great at all in the overall ranking, but managed to have a set with a better player than me where I was able to play a squash I never did play before. That was, even though I’ve lost, a key sign for my comeback. Last night, after placing 2nd, 3rd or even lower for the past 4 months or so, I managed to win again the local club league. It is not about the final win though, but the way I achieved it that is a sign to me.
I am positive with these signs and grateful I won this fight. I am all aware there will be others too. Till then though, I am so glad to be back. Thank you Gelu for helping me again to raise my game! You’re my best coach!